What I Would Tell My 17 Year Old Self (MRKH Edition)

Mindi Cartwright

Hello my fellow MRKH peeps. My name is Mindi Cartwright, I go by Oreo or Oreoprincess. I’m 25 years old now. I’ve been through a lot already and I’m here for “What would I tell my 17 year old self?” Hmm.. that’s a very difficult question. Not because I can’t think of anything, but because there is so many things I would tell myself. It’s that age where you’ve seen to have gone through a lot and (well for me) was depressed and confused. That age was about the time I was told I had MRKH. I was shocked and felt confused. I felt I wasn’t a woman, that I wouldn’t be able to be in a relationship if I couldn’t provide sex. I was confused as to what I was getting surgery for (Hysterectomy). I’ve argued with other women that I didn’t have to carry my own child to be a woman. Being told I wasn’t woman enough has been very hard on me, as it would on any woman. I was told I wasn’t woman enough by women and men. Life was tough filled with doubts and a consistency of people telling me I wasn’t enough. “I can’t be with you because I think I’ll cheat on you”, “You can’t carry a child? Than you’re not a woman”, blah blah blah….

So after all that being said here is what I would say to my 17 year old self.

1: You are more than enough. You were born for a reason, don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. You don’t have to provide intercourse to keep a man. Love is more than about lust. Don’t let those boys force you to change or perform other favors to win their love. If they really loved you you wouldn’t have to do anything you don’t want to do. Your love is enough. Ok, Enough said with that. 

2: Accept that you’re a weirdo! Truth is we’re all weirdos in our own way.

3: You don’t need anyone’s approval. Neither do you need someone to be with you. Be happy with being alone. Learn to accept who you are and be content with being your own company. Just because you are alone doesn’t mean you should feel lonely. Once you accept this good people will come along. Also, don’t search for love. Let love find you! I promise once you start loving yourself and your surroundings it will all fall in place.

Now young Mindi, know that everything happens for a reason. Let the universe guide you, don’t even stress the path you’ll take! Know you’re in good hands and what’s gonna happen is gonna happen even if you stress about it. Stressing will only make you go through it twice. Somethings you stress about most likely won’t be a big deal or even happen. Embrace life and who you are. Enjoy every second and always stop to smell the roses. Be kind even when someone isn’t so kind. You have no idea what others are going through. But more importantly, be kind to your self. You’re beautiful, kind and a weirdo! That’s beauty! Be you with out needing approval, enjoy yourself. Stay being young and free for the rest of your life. You’ll do great things. You’re going to be successful and I love you.

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